Jesus as a Bendable Action Figure
Approximately seventy percent of Americans identify as Christians. I chose the image of Jesus from Bend-ems Jesus of Nazareth because it is part of their... wait for it... play therapy supply. I am horrified that my sons were reduced to action figures of Batman and X-Men. There is always guilt attached to motherhood, so I will scrawl this small vignette in my moleskin journal reserved for such things.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-15458461/Surveillance-footage-shows-arson-suspect-pouring-gasoline-blaze-Mississippis-largest-synagogue.html
"Jesus Christ is Lord."
While millions of peaceful Christians are pleasantly sipping coffee, sending children off to school, attending conferences and volunteering at food banks, it is only the bendable Jesus action figures who make the news. And this news, usually involves freaks and fools.
At this moment, there is widespread transference popping up in media. Who exactly, is the angry author in the link below? This genre best is described as yellow journalism. The comments provide an echo chamber which is so deafening that collective tympanic membranes should be rupturing in sync. But the weave of the fabric is also one of confirmation bias. Oh, Christians! They are such hideous creatures!
https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2026/1/12/2362906/-Neighbors-told-the-Daily-Mail-that-Ross-was-a-hardcore-MAGA-supporter
My favorite "Jesus" story is from my nursing career. It comes from what I call "Tales from the Crypt"; stories which are generally not recounted in full due to the weak stomachs of the audience.
One night, eleven professionals were called out in the middle of the night in an attempt to remove an old-fashioned apothecary bottle from the colon of a male client. Various surgeons and specialists scurried in and out. A urologist imagined he could snake a urinary catheter past the bottle, inflate the balloon, and dislodge the bottle. A gastroenterologist was called. He tried his best to snare the foreign body without success.
The intercom into the post-anesthesia care unit cackled to life. "Lieutenant Commander Swofford, would you please come to O.R. 2? The anesthesiologist had a father who was a Navy Chief, so he always used my rank in the (civilian) hospital. I trotted in, expecting the usual. His goal was to make me hurl projectile vomit onto the sterile field. "Look through the endoscope, Tammy. Can you make out the raised bubbles on the bottle?" Sure enough. BR-549. Hee Haw. If you are of my parent's generation, you will get the humor. I really do not remember the numbers or letters. But - By Golly! - I trotted back into the safety of my space without the taste of bile in my throat.
The next day a different nurse cared for the man as he returned from the surgical suite minus his bottle. It had been surgically removed with a hand-assisted laparotomy. In the recovery room, he dialed up his wife. "Yes. Thank you, Jesus! Thank you, Jesus! The bottle is out." Jesus, had nothing to do with the hell he had put us through. But... he wanted his bottle back after it was properly identified by the pathologist. It was part of a set of three coveted bottles.
Jesus can be that bendable figure; the scapegoat for the actions of foolish and criminal man. But for Believers, he is symbolic of the goat that escaped, carrying our sins along with him; and now living within a barren landscape to distance us from the vast wilderness of our sins. We are free. And hopefully free of neurosis, if nothing else.
What the Jewish community commemorates as Yom Kippur the Christian denotes as the Grace of God.
But Jesus will continue to be that bendable action figure, part of a therapy supply of excuses for those who cannot exercise their own demons nor contain their own hatred against my faith.
Jesus Christ is Lord! smile
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